Nintendo Announces Wii Sex

Kyoto, Japan-A concept often joked about on message boards and Youtube, today Nintendo made the shocking announcement that the company is developing a game called Wii Sex.

Details are scarce, but from what little information is available, it’s clear that this game signals a stark departure from Nintendo’s traditional role as a developer of family-freindly products.

What we do know is that the game more or less sticks with the format of Wii Sports and Wii Play, with a collection of wiimote-based minigames representing various activities. Naturally, in Wii Sex these activities are all sex related. While we don’t have a full list of the activities included, we did see footage of two of them in action.

Masturbation for Man was the first game shown. In this game, the Wii remote spiritually becomes a sort of wiinis. Gameplay seemed to revolve around regulating the speed and intensity of wiimote “strokes” (light rhythmic shaking).  Stroke it too slowly and your mii avatar will lose his (ahem) enthusiasm, resulting in a game over screen. Pumping too fast, on the other hand, will result in burns and possibly cuts. This too will result in a game over, but with the added penalty that the minigame will then be unplayable for the next day or two.

Gangbang was the other game on display, and contrary to expectations, isn’t team based. Rather, this minigame centers on avoiding physical contact with other gangbang participants of the same sex as well as their bodily fluids. Male gangbangers will attempt to accost your character from behind, which must be dealt with by a swift jab of the remote. Occasionally, another male player will ejaculate in your direction, which will initiate a slowing of time, which Nintendo has dubbed “jizz-time.” Failing one of these jizz-time segments will require you to wash the wiimote several times with cold water before the game becomes playable again.

A wide assortment of sexual fetishes do seem to be in the works. However, when asked about how all-inclusive the game will be with regard to sexual orientation, the Japanese company stated that the game will allow for all “normal and acceptable” sexual orientations. The Nintendo representative then clarified that the only included orientations were “schoolgirl and younger schoolgirl.”

While the game seems to be completely male oriented, it has been revealed that the game is to come packaged with a penile sheath. “That for the ladies,” said the Nintendo rep with a sly grin.

Source: Dissociated Press

 

 

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~ by Krooze L-Roy on November 10, 2007.

6 Responses to “Nintendo Announces Wii Sex”

  1. Internet tough guy krooze

  2. Wooww .İnteresting.Thanks

  3. loli on my wii!? awesome!

  4. I wonder if eroge games like “Da Capo,” “Kanon,” “Shuffle!,” and “Let’s Meow-Meow” would come to wii, LOL!

  5. This website has so many good posts! Where do I start?

  6. FUCK

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